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I Could Have Used More Laughs and Fewer Tears, but 2015 Was Actually Pretty Okay

I Could Have Used More Laughs and Fewer Tears, but 2015 Was Actually Pretty Okay

Happy New Year! 2015, like every other year, had it’s ups and downs. However, it’s important not to let the year’s lows overshadow the highs. When I considered writing an end of the year retrospective, my face scrunched up in disgust as I reflected on 2015. Not my favorite year by a longshot. So much of it felt like a continuous struggle – like I’m in the middle of a significant lesson which I’ve tired of learning.

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3 Important Life Lessons I Learned From An Unlikely Friendship

3 Important Life Lessons I Learned From An Unlikely Friendship

One of my closest friends is a white woman 30 years my senior – a Baby Boomer. We shared a cubicle wall back in the ’00s when we worked in IT at a large insurance company. I hated that job so much that some mornings I’d sit in my car and cry before leaving for the office. It was the type of job where I had a micro-managing relic of a supervisor whom on a daily basis would periodically stroll by unsubtly peeking at our screens to make sure we weren’t surfing the internet.

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San Francisco, I Think I’m Over You

San Francisco, I Think I’m Over You

I’m kind of back to not liking living in San Francisco. Part of my disenchantment is probably my fault. I arrived here with big dreams I’ve yet to see realized. For one, I thought I’d fall into a good group of friends. Instead, someone I considered a good friend ghosted on me. Though I have made a few good friends whom I am grateful for, they’re from disparate circles. My social life is unrecognizable to me.

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Why Her, Why Now?

Why Her, Why Now?

Her death didn’t come as a complete surprise. A cancer diagnosis six years ago was only the first of three. Three times my poor friend had to endure intensely draining – in all senses of the word – cycles of surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. I saw her when she lost her hair and covered her head with baseball caps, generally opting out of wigs.

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Why “Black Twitter” is Important

Why “Black Twitter” is Important

I’ve been in San Francisco for two and a half years and I feel I am withdrawing. I don’t think I fit in here. I spend a lot more time alone than I did in my former life in Los Angeles. This past year has been particularly isolating as America’s longstanding simmering racial tensions bubbled up to the surface with a vengeance, ignited by Michael Brown’s murder last summer. After which, conflicting emotions of hopeless grief and building fury alternately gnawed at me.

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Don’t Call Me “Girl”

Don’t Call Me “Girl”

“Girls! Girls!” a large, middle-aged man in a bright yellow safety vest hollered at me and my new friend from across the parking lot as we walked away from my rental car. I turned slowly around, cocked an eyebrow and didn’t begin moving in his direction until my companion did. “Yes?” I asked with a touch of attitude as we neared him. He’d yelled out to us like we’d done something wrong. “Where are you girls going?” So far I liked nothing about this encounter.

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I Don’t Really Care About Buying a House

I Don’t Really Care About Buying a House

As my 40th year grows nearer, my dad insists that I need to consider buying property. To him – and many other Americans – owning a home is one of the cornerstones of success. I remember when my parents bought their first home. It was a source of pride for the whole family – a huge achievement. Owning a home was a visual representation of having “made it.”

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